So yesterday we had our Feeling Fab day. Originally thought it was going to be quite waste time, but I guess it turned out kinda okay. Cos my class chose the Forest Adventure thing at Bedok Reservoir there, which was some basically a bunch of High Elements stuff all in one big course. At first thought like "Been there done that" but it turns out there were quite a few stations which I'd never done before. Okay lah, a few did before, but there were some which were quite cool! TARZAN SWINGGGG. Oh especially the second one lol! The freefall feeling that time damn shiok. Got that ballsdrop feeling LOL. Ya and the zipline was damn fun! Cos most of the zipline is over water so its just like can sit there enjoy view and see the water rushing past your feet ^^ LOL and the landings are the best parts :'D Cos its like this sandpit, so if you dont land facing the correct the direction your ass will just drag along the sand for like 4-5m, which happened to me like TWICE. Gosh i suck. Haha then after most of finished we played cards while waiting for the other group to finish (Cos our class some people went to another group). LOL @weixuan and ryan being in the second group but chionging through just so they could catch up with our class in the first group. YA then we had 2 packs of cards, so we transformed like one table into like some casino table, but both groups just played daidi in the end :P OH but damn funny, Yi Lin won 3 times in a row cos her cards damn good. Got once she had ALL THE 2s but never say anything then when she won she was like super happy LOL everyone else was just like WTF. The class went out for lunch later but I had to pass up my parade claims and stuff so couldn't join them. Surprisingly, one of the first times I felt a bit bad i couldn't join them for a meal. Guess I'm warming up a bit, hopefully. But they went to eat at Swensen's so i was like "fk that shit ppl no $$" anyway T.T
Me and Ernest went back to Cat High first cos I needed to sign my parade claims first and Ernest had choir shit. BURDEN Ze Bin forgot to pass me his claims in the morning so I had to go meet him first hahahaha. Lunched at the coffeeshop (God I miss that place. Still rmb always eating there before Mr Jason's tuition last time LOL wonder how he's doing now). Then went back and had to derp around cos Sir Kuah was still having lessons. Met Jallene at the MRT later cos she was helping the rest pass their parade claims too LOL she was candy crush-ing all the way (sorry!). YA so on the way to HQ (almost typed Langkawi) we met CHEEEEEEEEEE. YA he just came back from langkawi so I asked him how it was then he was complaining about how they had to eat fast food there LOL. So we passed our shit up at HQ but Zb's form and mine got freaking rejected cos wrong format. Whatevarrrrr, redo lor. Decided to stone abit in HQ cos it's like a freaking time bubble. HAISHHHHH :SCHOOL:
Hao ba, I guess that's about it. Was initially a bit ranty, but I guess that's a paragraph for another post :) Just happy that I'm, well... content at this moment.
Good Night
[ Was listening to a Youtube mix and loved this song :) ]
It's been a shitty week for everyone the last few days I guess, with the exception of PDS Finals. But even then, was quite frustrating also. Somehow everything conspired in the last few days to screw up, and a lot of things that could go wrong went wrong like some freaking Pandora's Box.
So last Saturday was the PDS Finals. I don't really have much to say actually. Met Roocas and Jal at the MRT [Third wheel (again)] and we took the bus in. When we reached there the inspection was finishing up lor, so nothing much. We more or less derped around at the basketball court while the PDS team practised. At first they were in quite a joker mood and we needed them to be more serious. Then they became super nervous as their turn started approaching so we had to give them some talk and stuff :P DON'T GO ON TILT. First time seeing Roy's solo also which was... sex LOL. When it was around the time for the second group to perform we let them go and watch to give them some motivation to perform better. All the time we kept trying to remind them to not drop rifles cos nearly every school was doing so. Then the retarded part came when YTSS performed. Really sia, their prelim is scam people de (Sort of). They still deproved quite a bit from previous years. But their performance this time round was just flat out mad. It's like, your performance already not bad, still want put in the screwed up parts. Dance here dance there wtf, bringing FSD performance to a PDS final. Gotta admit the extreme toss was impressive, but it nonetheless has nothing much in common with PDS itself. You might as well throw a heavy stick across the parade square. Don't know if you'll get what I mean. Just saying the move was nice but definitely not representative of PDS. And Javier got balls lol, we dare him sout "FSD!!" he really shout at the end wtf. I really hope PDS doesn't go down the road of FSD dancing :/ sigh. BUT ANW, when our turn came up we tried to pump them up (GONG JIAO) and then ran back to spectate. During their whole performance I was like "Please don't drop please don't drop" especially at the J-Hook part. But after they proved my fears unfounded time and again I kept going "WAH SEX" cos it was really damn... sexy LOL (Got me so HIGH and then she dropped me). Bam, sex bomb, 2nd place WOOHOO. Damn proud of the team also cos I knew how haunting it was for them this time round, with more pressure after what happened last year. But the Part Ds of this year really have the makings of champions. Picking themselves up and gritting their teeth to do even better the next time round. And for that *salute*. Celebrated after that in school, but had to leave early to be in church cos of Easter Vigil T.T
Sigh, I told myself to just go balls to the wall that day. To not give a shit and just BE normal. Because I guess sometimes the most frustrating thing is to ACT normal even though it's crap. But in the end all I did was just put on another show. I've never broken it before and I sure as hell wasn't going to attempt to that day. Haish, trying to balance interests. Sort of, we weren't the only ones playing second fiddle that day. I don't understand what to do already :P Always a division below. Should be happy with the current state :P Siannnnn. Doesn't help that I don't try anything first. Now just finding pathetic excuses for myself.
So I haven't blogged in a while. Had a shit-filled week (in a good way... sort of) so couldn't luh.
Think I'll start off with FSD. Last sat was the grand finals. Was too lazy to wake up to go down all the way to school lol. So met jallene and rt at the yck. Apparently there was a shuttle service but we somehow missed the first bus. They said cab in so sua lor. Then while waiting at the taxi stand the next shuttle bus was driving off. Lol we were just like "shit is that the bus". Turns out it was, and luckily the bus driver saw us and stopped :D Haha then there was this idiot on the bus kept trying to troll us, keep saying the bus going shooting comp wtf. Heng ah we managed to catch the bus, damn heartpain alr (plus felt like an idiot) after cabbing down to Marina Sq cos i thought i was gonna be late. So YA, reached HQ then went to find buffbin and Ianny and the FSD team. Watched them practice for a bit before we went to spectate. Crap sia, their arrow part up till then still cmi, so we just "sua", whatevarrrr. So we watched the lower brackets compete first. And xiangbin was damn ass lol everytime he saw one that not really that good he go "one down" then Ian followed suit and was like "Casualty casualty". So that was that until our turn came. Wanted to give them pep talk but Weijie did it anw so we just tried pumping them up before running back to the tentage. Lol I swear our PDS team is the most retarded bunch of supporters. Ok maybe only Javier. OKAY then our performance started alr. The front part was damn sex (COS YOU COULD SHAKE IT SHAKE IT SHAKE IT YEAH YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO, YOU'RE A HOT MESS) but after that I felt it was a bit disappointing. Cos their coord wasnt really there and all. Like it was NOT BAD lah, but can tell that it was much better during trg. Think they were just quite nervous. But i rmb feeling quite shitty after watching their performance, maybe my expectations too high. Cos like looking at the videos, the only quite cock part was the arrow. The buddha part could've beem better, but it was still good. Aiyah okay we watched the Cedar FSD too. Lol i was going "Please win please win" cos Cedar FSD is one of those teams i REALLY respect and think deserve to win. Their coord is unparalleled and they dont resort to shenanigans like jumping or dancing in their performance. In a sense their choreo is the most legit and zai worthy of FSD champions. Just my 2 cents. But oh well they got 2nd in the end. We got 8th though! ^^ was hoping for a top 5 or 6 finish, cos our choreo i think was actually quite good. Just so happened that their nerves got the better of them. Haha then we revised our goal to Top 10 instead. Really proud of them in any case, cos I know most of them really put in effort not just during the comp itself but every single training:) This year Part Bs really got damn good potential. So rather late, but congrats on doing CHSNCCAIR proud! After results and shit they took a photo at the exact same spot as last year LOL under the "No image-capturing devices" sign. Ian xb and me had lunch before going back to sch for PDS trg, which ended quite late.
Light em up-up-up, I'm on fire
On to Camp STEEL. Booked in rather early for Day 0 and shit. The briefing ended quite quickly actually. So most of us went out of HQ for dinner. Lol both me AND zebin forgot take moneh from home so we decided to go my house take before going dinner. SO as we were walking out *coughcough* Zebin suggested that we take the bus. We all lazy so just okay lor. Waited like 10mins until the bus came. AND THEN zebin went "Oh fuck we no Ez-link" COS WE FORGOT TO CHANGE BACK OUR PASSES LOL. So we were like "screw it" AND WE RAN FROM THE TEMPLE BUS STOP TO MY HOUSE LMAO. Actually not that far lah, but it was freaking retarded. And zebin was saying "Wah tonight really YOLO". And we actually reached right after the bus LOL :'D Eat dinner come back then we had to recce/saikang the NAVEX route. Got one part damn funny cos one of the stations was the Sally building. Then all of us humji go near it. In the end like a bunch of retards we put our arms around each other's shoulder and walk around the building to find LOL. That time really everyone's balls shrink We more or less just went to sleep after that lurh.
Next morning was kinda normal, in-processing and shit. Only thing was 2 schools came late and one didnt come AT ALL. So yeah lah split them into platoons amd shit. I was APC for Bravo 6 (*clapclap* STEADY LAH) and BUFFBIN was the PC. Too manly. So the DC gave his address and stuff while we ate breakfast at the lepak terrace. After that was TBTL which was not bad :P Me and Xb ended up using alot of our orientation games lol. The most fun was ULTIMATEEEEE NINJAA. LOL the last round we tried playing as the whole platoon, ended up getting killed by Xiang Bin. Pffsht. Had lunch and shit before we were SUPPOSED to do our round robin. The weather was bloody cockblock. About half the platoon got through rappelling before a Cat 1 was called. Then just as it was about to end, it started raining. FUUUUUU. AND SO... The A Team CLT ah, wah damn power. His bullshit level over 9000. He help entertain my platoon for freaking 2 and a half hours just talking them. In my mind i was like "this guy ah... steady". Ya so after that we sort of had dinner and shit then was trainfire. At night, the usual lor, AAR then macs. John Lee damn cool, got contingency plan for McDelivery.
Next day we supposed to have 5BX but in the end the instructions cock up so Jeremiah just demo to them and they went off for breakfast LOL. Apparently breakfast was quite nice, but it was freaking oily :P Ya after that was their NAVEX lurh. We were lepaking in the terrace until bodi came and said we were supposed to walk around to "supervise". In the end we just go a bit then shift our lepak venue to log branch LOL. Just crashed cos we were damn shagged. NAVEX finished alr was more TBTL Until lunch or so. From there was just area cleaning and inspection. BUT THEN the DC, being the DC, told the TOs that they could leave by 3.30pm. So all the TOs call in their buses alr and we had to freaking rush every single shit. The admin team also had to re-organise the certs. Grrrr... aiyah dismiss alr had AAR which was meh also lurh.
So I guess this Camp STEEL was kinda okay actually, just that cos of the rain it was damn sian. Was freaking shag for climbing trg the next day. Even dozed off while they were showing the routes wtf. And and and i find it kind of funny that not too long ago XB said something and I was like "siao, you give me one day i also cannot complete". But kind of happy I managed to do it ^^
Holy Week now, got alot of time to think to myself. And I thought I'd got over it alr, but when it came up again I realised i hadn't. But then when I heard what was next it reminded me of what I always said to myself. So yeah, and I realised it was true too when I heard. If i cant handle it once in a while, how to handle everyday. And it makes me treasure it more also. When i knew, I know I shd be happy lurh, but I couldnt help feeling a bit irritated, and I hate that. This kind of thing shdnt get in the way, but oh well. Whatever. Even within that day it was a short time, but it was the simple things and company that made it so enjoyable to me, and that was really all I needed. And maybe bored people are right sometimes :P
Cemented the idea that people suck today. The most heartwrenching thing. So today we had our volunteer experience at MPFSC. Was initally quite sceptical (skeptical, whatever) about how it would go, cos haven't really worked with elderly before. Plus, find it so hard already to talk with people of my own age, how to interact with the old peeps lol. Plus, Chinese wtf. Never touched it for so long, speaking today was like some retard, seriously. But in any case we were just listening to them tell us about themselves. And you could tell that they were happy already just to have people listen to them. So the ah ma told me about herself and stuff, then I asked about her family. And she was really damn sad cos they only visited her once a year even though the fking lived in Pasir Ris wtf, not even that far. Saying that even being their friend was better than how they treat her as their ah ma like that. Really felt like shit after hearing that. Just so happened that she was the ah ma of one of the VJ volunteers there also. Alicia and I decided that maybe we could go visit them every friday or so. Then the most fked up thing happened. We asked the granddaughter if she had their house number (in case we wanted to go and they weren't at home) and she replied "Oh can't be bothered to have their number". In my mind I was like wtf if I could slap that bitch right then I would have if not for the fact that she was, well, a bitch (Female). Really learnt to appreciate my own grandparents from that experience and can say that it was definitely rewarding. But the point is that I realised that okay it's not me who's being pessimistic but it turns out humanity is shit in the real world. Hope that I can cheer them up :)
I don't know bout you, but I'm feeling 22
So hard now. I sort of realised that nowadays I don't really do anything unless I see a need for it. So as a result I'm more or less silent with newer people. Familiar faces are a different story. But someone asked me "You don't intend to make VJ your home right?" And with unsettling certainty I thought to myself and realised "No". Maybe it's too early too call anything now. In any case the only thing I look forward to these days are N Air trainings in sch or HQ stuff. Hope this changes though, even if I don't think it will. Can't be anti social for 2 years :P And I also find it kinda amusing how the system is completely different. Back then it wasn't hard because being open and approachable was all you needed. Now something else comes into play. So well, I guess what other people say is true. Didn't believe it last time, but now I do.
Not wondering anymore, because I know. All I'd ever ask for is a fair chance.
If I ever let you know
Good Night
These are the words I held back as I was leaving too soon
The story of Snape. Because even though he did try, what chance did he have? And all he could do was watch. Watch and do the best he could in his capacity. They say that history is written by the victors. And the victors are usually the ones that get there first innit?
So we had the second part of post interview on wednesday. It was pretty funny, considering the fact that some of them were really quite blur. Found it kind of irritating though, that the "default" post was Part B Spec. Basically those that sort of wanted a post but knew they'd prolly not get anything "good" just aimed B Spec for the sake of aiming. Damn waste of time, sigh. But the part that sort of really mattered was the last guy. We all could see that he was really trying his best to redeem himself. And that, to me, was what really made me rethink my initial impressions of him. I believe that everyone deserves a second chance, so with him, I didn't see why not. Hopefully, he will continue this attitude, because it would definitely benefit the unit a hell lot. He's the sort of person that would be able to gain the respect of the cadets very easily if he wanted to. So all he needs to do, I guess, is to believe in himself. Jiayous to you.
It was also from this that I realised what I loved so much about the Chaos Walking was the whole redemption idea. Because truly caring about someone is means forgiveness and redemption in your eyes, no matter how screwed that person might be. And that though everyone is imperfect, you gotta keep trying, because who knows, someday you might succeed :)
Had BAWC Test Day proceed as according to the AI. But wtf, it was bloody screwed up that day. Almost everyone couldn't make it cos of the Camp STEEL stuff, and *cough*certainpeople*cough* just didn't show up. So it turned out to be Jallene, me and also Pang, Kishore-(MIRA LOL) and Jalynn (Is that how you spell? Ah whatever, Jallene v2.0) doing the stuff. Damn heng, cos originally it would've been me and Jallene tanking all the shit. Then SOMEHOW the wing I chose WASN'T GLUED TOGETHER WTF. So when Danial (Oh yeah he dropped by a bit) was testing one guy, he overbanked and the damn wing just snapped in half. SO... we just finished up the theory shit and gave them back. Decided to completely reschedule their practical to the 2nd frame, cos by then we SHOULD (and this is a big if) have the stock in. So more or less that was that. Had dinner after that with Ze Bin, (Mira)Bodi they all.
So there was Air Cohesion today too. Don't know why but I felt damn irritated after the movie (which was ABTM2, but whatever), and not just cos I was tired.
Aiyah I don't know lah, not sure if it's just me or is everything else getting shittier by the damn day, not just my problem. Maybe if I had some balls too I would've not given a shit too and just plonked. But one does not simply undermine the unspoken agreement lol. Some days I wonder if I hadn't let it go that way. But I realise that maybe it wouldn't have made a difference. Maybe. But I guess there's one thing I think I'm still sure about.
