Conversations

I actually wanted to rant today but since I got that out of the way before this, I'll just bull out what I can because... well just because.

So yeah I got posted to VJC. At first I was dreading the travel time but I realised it wasn't that bad. Ok it is still quite long but it's the kind of thing you sort of get used to, kinda like walking to HQ. Don't think it'll be too bad after a while. I did try the appeal, but it didn't go through. Suprisingly, I wasn't even disappointed. I think after experiencing VJ it turned out to be a school I'd rather enjoy. I was even sort of hoping my appeal wouldn't go through so I didn't have to make another choice. I guess I sent it in so that I could tell myself "Hey at least I tried". So no regrets there :) First day of orientation was kinda weird but okay lah. Cos there were quite little people from each school, so every group had different schools, with the exception of maybe VJ IP and VS.

Had to wake up early next morning for BAWC, which was more of a mehh. Bloody Danial ponned, Jon Loke also. HAISH. I was supposed to teach theory which was actually a ticking time bomb. I thought I could still remember all the shit, then kept screwing up at the start. Ying Wei and Daniel helped, then after that I got to the more familiar topics so it sort of went okay after that. Kishore failed the test, but I think he can still come to try again. He does have the passion after all, so hopefully he can make it one day. The DC treated us lunch after BAWC lol!

Damn this post is boring. Thank you if you stuck through it. But I can't just be ranting all the time, people say I'm too serious sometimes. Everyone has their own intentions, I just haven't figured yours out yet. I hope you don't regret it.

Good Night

BoS

Well it's kinda late now, but I guess I'm used to sleeping much later. Sigh I have no idea how I'm going to sleep early again when school starts. Which is actually sort of the reason I'm posting today. I'm actually afraid of going to school. Ok afraid isn't really the word. I think "anxious" is better. New environment, new culture, new people. I don't make good friends easily, but when I do, they're family (See what I did there. Ok nvm that was retarded). But I guess that's the truth. And now everyone pangseh to go Hwa Chong or Raffles. Sigh, again. Maybe I should really just think for myself sometimes. You don't set out to get people to know you, but sometimes it's hard to swallow when people don't want to because of something you yourself can't control. But that's life innit. You take what you get and try to make the best out of a shitty circumstance.   Just saying, I'm not raging now. Nor frustrated to be honest. It's not even sad. It's just... suck it up. Bopian.

People suck. I mean now, literally, there is no hope for humans. That accident today, is already sad enough. I find myself wondering how anyone in the right fucking mind would actually take a picture of that. It’s sick. Sick to the core. And people continue spreading. You fucking mad? You lifeless shit, still can joke about it. That keyboard warrior on Twitter, not so big now eh. If you really did respect those kids and want them to RIP, don’t fucking spread the pictures like an insensitive mofo. It’s not even funny in the least bit, and I’m being completely serious and sincere here.

On another note.

I still find it kind of funny how the 2 groups are so similar in working yet different in appearance. That one person that will succeed while others watch on. I'm very sure this is the case, just that how obvious it is, is a different matter altogether. And how amusing it is also because the success stems from something they were born with, something you can't control. But I guess you learn after a while to entertain yourself with this situation and eventually, well... :)

When the time came, maybe I should've grown some steel. And you know what sucks. It sucks that if it was just different I could at least say something. But now I can’t. I can’t because if anyone knew I’d be in a worse position than complete bullshit. It would change almost everything of worth to me.

“I know that it's your soul but could you bottle it up? And get down to the heart of it”

Good Night

Frustrated

*wipes sparkly internet dust off*

There we go

I don't really know where to begin. I guess I started blogging again because I needed somewhere to vent. When I didn't need to it just sort of died I guess. Well this isn't a rant or anything (although it might turn out to be one), but I think I finally need to say things that I can't tell anyone face to face because I'm too much of a malawach.

Just that feeling a bit frustrated. Not just about the results. It's more of a ''Can't you fucking see I actually give a shit'' even though you obviously don't. As much I might dislike ''certain person'' I can't say I don't understand what he meant. Sigh. Maybe really, it's not worth it to give a shit anymore, even if I can't help it. What to do, you can't escape your element. Learn something called loyalty. Whatever happened to face to face? Why can't anyone actually realise what the fuck is in front of their bloody faces? You still want to act like that?

I'm not going to talk about my results because frankly, I don't really have the mood for anything now. I just wish I was a blur-as-shit Sec 2 again when we actually rmb one another.

I don't know what more to say, I can't even put it on this dumbass post.

B.O.H.

No one must ever know.

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A Month

About a month since I last posted. In between got all the school stuff, plus slacking. And slacking some more. But maybe it's also cos like nothing bother-ish in the last month. So don't really need to complain about stuff here. So sry I neglected you blog.

I'm back baby!

Actually not really. Cos I'm supposed to be hardcore-ing History. And I guess Chem also. I think SS can just give up. Unless next week I go into over-drive. Come to think of it, that doesn't sound too bad. That's IF I'm able to adhere to it. Now's probably a bad time to start playing a new game. Gahhhhh

I just realise I got a lot to talk about.

So I finished New Girl some time last week. Episode 11 to 24(?) In one shot. Ultimate 4hours of my life. The show is AWESOME. Not just cos it's funny and stuff, but also cos it hits home. You wish you lived with Jess, Schmidt, Nick and Winston. And Jess. Omg. I swear, I'm going to meet ZD one day. The season finale was quite good. At first I thought Nick would really move out. Then I thought heck, it's Nick. And Cece is hot. Overloadddddddd. I hope Season 2 doesn't take too long...

So I have remedial tomorrow. And I don't really feel like going. Physics. Mr Quay. Not like I go school will do anything productive. Prolly just stone/sleep. I need to learn from Jing Yew. That's a real BAMF. But I'll probably just go anyway. Cos hey, I'm fucked either way. Might as well go and disturb Marcus.

People are retarded.

Ok certain people. I think someone has been taking my money. I can't be sure though. Cos I don't have proof. But certain people never change. Pfft, gift my ass. Well at least I'm keeping track now. So if really missing anything I'll know. So yeah. Some people need to get their own goddamn life and stop leeching.

And then there's just now. It's fucked up when you feel fucked up for no reason/randomness. Did that make sense... ok. Seriously though, the juxtaposition (hey, literature) of that situation. Even though you don't know. Just, AGHHH. Sometimes you feel like life fucks you over just because it can. Putting things just within your reach and then jerking it away. Motherdie... pfft.

Timo got his first split-screen MOAB. So at least that's good. And I played like shit after that, ironically. I think I rush too much.

Which seems true for almost everything else.

Yay.

Good Night (wtf I'm hungry now)

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Viva La Vida

See ah, this is just like Primary School again. Some people just need to COPY. It doesn't matter what right. I want my own things, you have to perpetually take them away. Every single fucking time. You know what? Balls to you. Don't come find me when you eventually fuck yourself over. Which I know you will. Go find your own goddamn circle.

I am the circle and the circle is me.

Sian. Last 2 weeks couldn't do much cos of that accursed History test. And that's only like 12 essays or so. Can't imagine Prelim 2 Modern World. Actually, come to think of it, should start now already. Then still got Chem. Organic Chem!!! Need to start understanding it. Perfect Guide, anyone? Timo still needs it so I have to wait till his MYE over first before I can revise it. For now, focus on compiling all the subjects' stuff. My cupboard now is like a bomb exploded inside. I just shove shove all my things inside. So, need to sort it out. Maybe tonight. Although I'll prolly procrastinate. But at least I did PDA alr. But it was damn screwed up! First time <20 :( But then the questions also don't make sense. I seriously wonder who does the diagrams.

Getting more ideas for FSD

I had the weirdest dream so far last night. Somemore I rmb the entire dream, not just one part. So it was like I was having this race in the ocean, as part of some Cat High thing. Then there was this guy, who had some powers or something. So he went into this like arcade room. But a bad guy captured him and force him to summon this frigging beast sea monster! So everyone abandon ship! Ahhhhhh! Then we swam to the finish. And at the finish line got someone taking pictures. I think was Mdm amd Zhan Hong. Plud there was this huge group of random people. Got some NPCC guys doing PDS. Plus some dancers. So I was walking around and see Fr. Paul Staes wearing a suit and sitting in the hot sun having lunch with some students. They all sweating like mad.

And then I woke up. Dafaq did I just dream?

Some people really need to die in a hole. People just ignore your shit, or get duped by your antics. I know what it's really like. But I can't do anything right? If I do, I'm unreasonable. I'm unjustified. I'm bullying. So whatever. I'll just wait for you to die on the streets. Cos taking my stuff never seems enough to you. Worthless shit.

Good Night

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