Come back to that later. For now, serious stuff.
CHS NCC Air. Yes, my beloved CCA. And I'm very afraid of the future for it. Right before my eyes it is crumbling, person by person, post by post, and I'm helpless as to what to do. I'm gonna just thrash it out here to get it off my chest. Crappy shit mood. USM that like very bo chap, ASM who I hardly see/hear, a Part C UDI that's too nice, a Part B UDI that's too strict and other shit. I'm starting to doubt whether my character is suited for my post. Guess I should have swapped posts with Ian. He's - to put it nicely - temperementally unsuitable for Part B UDI, yet I think he'll make a good C UDI. Even so, I'm not sure. The NCOs care more about what happens in RGS rather than our own unit, and I'm influenced as well. On my side, I'm really too nice. Maybe it has something to do with not being hated and remembered well. Guess I'll have to start afresh next training. And the lines are getting more blurred by the training. Friendship outside training creeping into training hours is not viewed with the same severity as before. This change in mentality is redefining boundaries which we have no idea where to stop. Then again, stubbornly going against the tide will ultimately result in getting run over. But I keep thinking, with our limited involvement with HQ, will the traditionalist style really be so detrimental? It's too late to overhaul everything now. What I can hope for is to ease into somewhere in between, instead of blindly currying favour to be well-liked.Humans are social creatures. Thats why solitary confinement is only reserved for the most putrid, hardened criminals. But in order to achieve the ways of old while trying to sieve out the bad facets of it, image sacrifices will have to be made, especially on my part (pun not intended). But then again, another dark horse is riding, and I'm unsure as to whether it is a threat to me. He may be unwittingly doing so, but I believe when the crucial time approaches he will be smart enough to utilise his connections, and I will be in trouble. I'm not being insecure, rather, cautious. Overestimating someone due to arrogance on your part is fatal.
Society's like that, eat or be eaten. And the only way out is to play along while minimising the damage on your morals. Trust me, no one's gonna accept you for who you are. You can go on believing in Born This Way, but in the end, if you ain't got the moolah or the looks, you're cannon fodder. Life sucks, deal with it, and you should come out lightly bruised only.
Oh well, in lighter news, my parents locked my com account, again. Thank God for WiFi, again. And my SIM card screwed up again, really need to get it changed soon. Turns out Julian Teo is teaching us E Maths. That's why I had to chiong on monday night and tues morning so I couldn't blog. Oh well...
Wish me luck
Good Night
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Are your emotions of the day getting the better of you?or have your thought this over for a long time?From what i see in the post above, i am infering that you are starting to be cautious of your own partmates now.Correct me if i am wrong.And there are many conflicts and misunderstandings in this post. The NCOs should have a heart to heart talk on this topic don't you agree? I cant help but feeling that you are becoming more and more like yann yih.
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